Sometimes I really question my sanity. I mean really! I left a high paying job for this? I was completely miserable in the high-paying job, but this... this is completely exhausting.
I am teaching symbiosis in my science class this week. So we are learning about three kinds: mutualism, commensalism, and parasitism. I grabbed a handful of kids to read tiny skits today describing a school situation and had them identify the type of symbiosis that matched with the description of the relationship. This went great in my 5th period science class. It was a bit disorganized, but that is just par for the course.
In my 6th period class I selected three girls and three boys to participate. I handed out the cards quietly before the bell rang. One student of mine made a fuss that they did not get picked and I said that I just picked randomly (in reality, I was attempting to engage students that do not ask a lot of questions and thus don't speak in front of class much, but I said it was random). Upon completing the first skit the student began whining again and then started the entire class in chanting "Teacher's pet, teacher's pet, teacher's pet". I don't know if I have ever felt so terrible in my life. I'm here because I want to be in the lives of young people, but I never understood how cruel they can be for selfish reasons. Not only did that person start it the rest of them participated. I told them how disrespectful and horrible I felt, but I don't know if they care. The student proceeded to tear the assignment we were working on into tiny little pieces and scatter them over the floor and then was off task and rebellious the rest of the period. I sent a message home, but I'm so incredibly green and inherently a sweet person that I just... I fall flat on my face so many times a week assuming that these kids inside are really nice kids.
So, I've been down this week. My ability to bounce back has been almost nonexistent. I've been battling dragons, both in the room and in myself.
To leave it on a positive(ish) note: I have one student that has been really struggling to get their work done all trimester. A dear soul, but a troubled one. Between the parents and myself I finally managed to get this young one back on the right track. After an entire trimester with an F in the class they dragged their grade up to a B-. One of the make-up assignments (for a lost science journal) was a great paper on the movie Apollo 13 and how it tied to the scientific method that was beautiful in the depth of understanding and contextualizing. Yesterday I entered grades, and then snuck the student's grade report into their math class, and turned around to watch a silent gleeful cheer of: "YES!". It felt so good to bring someone so down up again. Of course, that person has now lost their second science journal and is still off in la-la land most of the period, but for one moment I felt like I really could make a difference.
